Have – Do – Be… a very simple model that we (in our in-house trainings) teach / preach in Coaching; one that we liken to the analogy of a tree with fruits. So how does it work? Simple… the tree has fruits – which can be likened to fruits of our labor being achieved… goals attained, or target acquired.
Now… to reach these fruits, one need climb the tree – which could represent the actions that we do in an effort to reach our goals. This is represented by the tree’s trunk – as it connects the fruits (at the tree’s top) to the roots (at the tree’s bottom). So, to reach the fruits, we need to do some action that will get us closer to the fruits – until we eventually reach them.
And, as mentioned earlier – at the tree’s bottom are it’s roots… symbols of the unseen factors that affect our actions – whether we realize it, or not. These roots are symbolic of four such factors which we identify as our values, beliefs, assumptions and thoughts.
Why these four? They influence our actions and decisions. For example, when we have our thoughts… whether we voice it out or not, we are possibly reacting to some outside stimulus (see, hear, smell, touch) and these reactions are actually formed based on our experience - our own or others, in which case, this latter situation can be seen as assumptions. These experiences may be seen as truths (at least, our version of it) and we may come to conclusions – or even judge a situation or person, based on what these experiences have taught us… in a stimulus / response manner. We oftentimes refer to this as learning.
These learning experiences can form truisms… maybe even cultures, if said truism is replicated to a whole community. For example, openness of a community to strangers – or caution, could be due to said community’s collective experience with said strangers. It won’t matter if said strangers stumbling into contact with their community represent a statistical representation of a country’s population to form an acceptable pattern – just one stranger adversely affecting them can keep them on their guard come next time another stranger appears. These truisms, in turn, become beliefs and even values.
If they’re still hard to grasp, it’s my limitation in explaining them without expounding on the ideas some more… and as I am writing (typing really) these words at 2am, I hope to either find time to expound them in my second pass (editing), or leave things as they are – after all, the Have – Do –Be is the lynch pin of this entry… but not necessarily the cornerstone. On the other hand, I’m sure many others can think of other considerations that can join this group of four if one really thinks hard enough – and they may even be right – but for now, let’s just stick with these, as they are just background to – and not the main reason for my current thoughts.
Nope, that Coaching model (if we can call it that) was just the introduction (hence the need to get it out of the way ASAP) – what is the more important aspect here is my using this same model with what I am doing right now. Easier said than done, apparently – because, the Have – Do – Be model needs a firm understanding of the ‘end in mind’ (the ‘Be’ part).
My problem is, I have not been putting strong focus on any ‘Be’s these days – hence, the feeling of unfocussed living of my life. Why do I feel this way? Simple… my current situation, wherein I have a very nebulous earning capacity these days, makes me feel unhinged – specially since there are days where I need to find ways to meet my expenses, and contribute to the household maintenance. Until I find a steadier source of income, I will remain unhinged. What’s worse is that I feel too reactionary – no proactive sense at all.
The problem is… I have not been able to search for a new job – although, I will also have to admit that I have not really been too active in searching for one… relying instead on what I used to do – that is, part-time training, which paid well before… though not too well these days after the U.S. recession – so that’s what? Since November of last year… almost half a year has gone by. Damn…
So… what should I be doing? Let me try things form a Have-Do-Be perspective.
‘Have’: I want to have a high paying job – one that will give me at least six figures a month… even after taxes, and reward me – in terms of both compensation and career advancement. What kind of job? Therein lies the rub… what do I want, and what can I offer to a company or organization? I will naturally have a bias towards training business… after all, it’s the business I’ve been in for decades – but it seems that such a business may not help me achieve such a goal. Either that, or I’ve not been looking at this the right way.
Though many people – not in the training business, of course, will quickly say that the reasons training practitioners do not earn that much is because they do not directly contribute to the profit margins… or are perceived to be stress-free (or at the very least) have little stress in their jobs.
I don’t think this is true either… but I will need to sit down with whoever says this and enumerate what they do and what we do. Yes we don not possibly contribute directly to sales and marketing… until you figure out who is making sure that the sales and marketing folks have their knowledge and skills in place – yes even the experienced hires. But again, this is a different point.
So… what now?
‘Do’: I need to assess my transferable skills… one that can be used in any business? I need to know my strengths… to see what other career I can jump in to. In that regard, I took the Strength Finder test, and it told me what my top five skills are – and I could readily agree with them. But how do I leverage these? And for that matter, are these enough?
I feel that I just scratched the surface. I need to know – or discover more. I need to reassess my capabilities, and I have a book that can help me… specifically, ‘What Color is your Parachute’ – and I should do the activities inside it. Lord knows I’ve had this book for about a year now… but I was still in a relatively comfy enough job – both when considering work and pay, so I was in a comfort zone. Back then, I already knew it wasn’t something I wanted entirely… but I was too busy earning to stop.
Will doing this… namely assessing my strengths, be worth it? Will this help me solve my problem? Won’t it be considered a waste of time? Won’t this be something akin to ‘analysis paralysis’? My answers in the same order… I hope so; maybe not immediately – though it can be a necessary prequel to the exercise of solving my predicament – as it can certainly help me avoid future problems; waste as compared to what? I mean, I’ve already got a lot of time that I’m not maximizing; and no it won’t be – at least, so long as it is not preventing me from acting out on some solutions. But… it is not a direct ‘Do’ action item when considering what I’m talking about – so what else can I ‘Do’?
Well, there is… for starters, the idea my dad broached to me… about trying out his business – though with a different perspective. Basically it’s pre-need selling, specific to memorial lots. Now that may not be the most attractive product (and yes, there is a product – specifically the memorial lot being sold), but in practical terms… people eventually die. Question is, will they be able to say that they won’t let their family worry about where to put their departed loved one – them or someone else, when that time comes?
Right now, dad’s business model is to set up shop and offer the lots to the people near the office. Fully dependent on walk-ins and a (deputized) sales force coming from these walk-in folk, once the business model is explained to them – so basically a form of pyramid selling – without the negative connotation of the pyramiding scheme. Despite this, the business can only go so far. What he proposes I do, is to actively market the same concept - but not via sales office (though that, too is open to possibilities), but to target companies in the Calabarzon (south of Paranaque and Muntinlupa) area.
It’s ideal is several ways – for one, dad will be there to help me out… and so will Burs (my youngest sister – half-sister, really… but I don’t care too much for the details). Next, it taps my (Strengthfinder) skills – so it’s akin to saying I can jump into the role like a fish in water.
Downside? It’s not a full employ, and it won’t get me my five figures… at least, not yet… unless sales will really be booming… and continuous for years to come (decades preferably). I’ll be basically an entrepreneur here… which is both good and bad – good since it will make me stretch my wings… bad because… well, I’m not exactly the most detail-oriented person to run a business and keep pristine records (i.e. I’ll need an accountant).
So what else can I do? Actually, that’s it for now. I can’t think of any other option right off the bat, that won’t be a ‘status quo’ thing… and as I said earlier – the status quo is not working out, right now.
And what of my ‘Be’?
To be brutally honest with myself – how do I answer the question ‘How did I get into this mess?’ Do I always look for the simple way out? No, not really? Am I not a dependable person? Definitely not! What attributes am I lacking? Right now… I’d have to say ‘Passion’. Passion for what I’m doing – passion for improvement, passion for getting things done right and well – though I have rarely slacked in this regard, since my strong sense of accomplishing what is right by the customer always gets things done right. But going back to passion - it may be this lack of passion that is making me act complacent. But I was certainly not always this way.
What was the root cause for this? Can I trace it back to my I/ACT days? I don’t think so – I was very passionate there… I always gave it my all… my best. It was in the latter days – when I perceived that management was not acting in – say, I/ACT’s best interest that I lost some passion in continuing to work for them… but not to work in a training business.
When I transferred to Fujitsu, I had a better pay… and I was in demand – but I held on to my principle of loyalty to the company – though, it, apparently could not hold on to me… thanks to 9/11 and it’s effect on the global economy. But then, I should have seen the writings on the wall – realizing that the training business was not really a priority of our CEO back then and he and the Chairman did not really see eye-to-eye. Still, I had a very good team – one of the best… which I helped build ground-up… a feat I replicated, by the way, from my I/ACT days. Still, it wasn’t enough, it seems. I’d say my frustrations started then.
Later, my joining PrimaryEdge was a good thing to start with – again it was about training… a strength I definitely had.. and it brought me into contact with colleagues I would really know and respect. Though I was not the lead – I was, in many instances, accorded the unofficial accolade of someone who was a senior (not age related – but experience specific). It would have been a good job – had it not been for the management… once again.
Why training businesses I end up with are not being handled by passionate training practitioners is a wonder… and this, once again, became apparent when I was talking to the CEO of PE – who saw training as a less stressed and therefore less pay valued job. I could disagree a whole lot – and I’m sure she was saying this to us… but equally preaching about such benefits to their main client. So I can’t fault her for her shrewdness. But I can fault her for not keeping her pool of faculty happy.
This was true in several cases… but I’m not writing this to dig up past instances – and remembering just puts me I a foul mood, so let me just say, I was again frustrated… and was wondering if the pattern I could see was because of me… a dangerous situation, since I was beginning to doubt my capabilities.
This self-doubt creeps in at times… and I have to convince myself (yet be careful not to delude myself) that I am not a failure… I am not at fault… I am not just lucky… but I, too, need to be more assertive – if not aggressive. I am a great professional – globally capable and able to adapt to a globally challenging culture, one with high work values. I am a great leader / manager – specially when in a training business. I can work with the best of them – and am considered (without hubris) one of the best trainings business facilitators.
I can hold my head up high… and I can handle any work that entails building teams, managing teams and setting goals, managing problems and keeping morale high. I value respect for the Individual, continuous improvement of the person and the processes, client relationship is something I value highly – but not at the expense of the team or the organization. I can sell ideas and am not shy to talk to anyone on a business level. I’m a management asset to anyone willing to try me out… and any organization that does not hire me, missed one hell of a human asset – their loss… not mine.
Question is… is that all I need to adjust in my ‘Be’s?
Not the end of my self discussion / self-disclosure… not by a long shot. I will need to review this document once in a while… and reflect on it. After which, I will need to do the hardest thing… a plan of action - something challenging, doable, yet not too safe / comfortable.
So definitely, this isn’t the end, but rather… a ‘to be continued’.
Our band loses a mainstay.
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Have I already shared the fact that I joined the High School Alumni band as
a vocalist? If not, I first joined them during our 40th anniversary year.
We pe...
5 months ago





















