Memoirs Q11: How do you Define Success, and how has that definition evolved over time?

In different times of my life, I would say success has been attached to things I desired to get or achieve. For a long time, at a younger age and point in my career, it was achieving success at work. Early on, that would mean learning what I needed to learn and be able to use / train others to use these. A programming language, a program I create shifted to being able to share this knowledge to others and make them empowered with using the new learnings.

An example would be to teach others the advantages of dBase III+ dot commands, as opposed to just relying on basic Lotus 123. I showed my students back then that dB3 was more flexible with the use of data, specially with the sorting and filtering of data for reports. Yes, yes... that comes across as too shallow nowadays - specially with the visual basic aspects embeded into Excel these days, thus allowing pivot tables... but back then, this was the equivalent knowledge level in a pre-windows world.

Another measure of success - one thrust upon us as a training team, was the satisfaction survey of the perticipants / customers, giving a score range form 1 (the worst, or poor), to 5 (the best, highly satisfied). So I strove to get high scores... if not fives. My pride drove me... I needed to prove this to myself, and show it to others. This made me look and be accepted as a great facilitator - maybe not the best, but definitely one of the best.

Evantually, I got tired of getting the high marks - it seemed superflous, and I shifted my focus for success in being able to ensure I could lead the team, do proper knowledge transter - if not from me, then from others in the team. I needed to make everyone better at being skilled to teach differing topics. My aim was redundency - should someone call in sick, I would hope that someone else can jump in on short notice and take the absent person's place and continue the lessons from there. So you could say, my focus and measure of success - at least for me, was to be a better leader, supervisor, mentor to my team.

I already shared my experience in Tanzania - I would have to point out that my stint in the Asian Development Bank, exposing me to different nationalities and cultures, helped me tackle diverse audiences. Ironically, it was not to ignore the differences - but learn about them, and find similarities. Or share knowledge of how these differences,make me get to know each individual even better.

So my view of success changed based on what I deemed as important to get the job done.

However, when I got married, and barbie and I started raising Bryce and Bernice, my priorities and measure for success, likewise shofted once again. This time, it was to be a good provider, a good husband and a good parent. I opted to be a good example to my kids.I needed to be a batter partner to Barbie - to prove we could be a loving family. I was painfully awar of the difficulties I went through as a child in a broken family, so I used staying together as a family, and making things work, as a measure of success. To date I still work with making the family stay together, and I may have been lacking in some things, but I compensate in other means.

As a Toastmaster, I've had some metrics to follow as well, and though I may not be able to achieve everything I wanted, I still focused on some intangibles. I made HOLA shine, and I made Division N feel more solid as a community.

Now? My measureof success is to make things better, to anake people better - to coach, mentor , lead, work side-by-side with. I need not go after millions - and I would think twice about that if it would sacrifice my family's wholeness or happiness, or my personal integrity as a civic leader.

So yeah, now success is about building a better world, one step (or action) at a time. Build a legacy - but cotinue learning, improving, and caring, sharing, celebrating life when I can - though responsibly. As much as possible. I want to enjoy life within my means. Accept what I have, and challenge myself with what I can change.Stay humble, stay simple, stay grounded - follow my true north, and live life the way it should be dome - peaacefully. happily, responsibly.