Memoirs Q31: What are some misconceptions people have about you? (updated)

"Oh, yes. I'm the great Pretender..." Impostor syndrome sometimes creeps in on me when I'm in a project. There are times I'm just a few slides or lesson plans ahead of my students, but I get to come across as confident, competent and in control. If only they knew, I'm just good at looking calm and collected - but I get to push things through. I get to practice in break times, do a google search when I give them assignments. My mind is on overdrive to understand? Guts... maybe even foolhardiness... I sure have lots of those.

But I challenge myself to deliver - I may have learned something just the night before, but I research about it, and around it, so I have a practical or working idea, and not just 'textbook explanations'. That way, I can give out of the box ideas - talk tangent, yet still related topics, and ask my students questions that they apprecaite realizing the answer to. I research, and always look at things from the 'user', or the student's viewpoint. I try to answer "Why would they need to know this?" or maybe even "How do I get to explain things in an understandable, and relatable manner." - specially for technical or abstract ideas.

So misconception one? I'm well versed in so many things.

Well... not really. A few really deep cut - that's possible. I sound confident - perhaps because of my Toastmasters training. Plus the books I've read, or the videos I've wathced. I mean, if you want ot learn something? You can google search write-ups about it. Or watch how to videos in YouTube. Seek ideas? Watch a TED Talk. I know I've done it before.

One time, I learned how to assemble a PC just by watching YouTube, I did not even have a dsimantled PC to practice with while I was watching. But I realized that you just need one tool - a Philips screwdriver - the rest? Just like a jigsaw puzzle - each item has a specific connector type, so it would be near impossible to mistake connecting what shouldn't connect. Armed with this realization, I then taught it the next day in class. Mind you, the only reason I did this was because I couldn't find anyone to lecture about it in time. Surprising thing was, I even got the comment that I really knew what I was talking about.

Imagine that... I can sing about the Great Pretender and make it mean several things in various parts of my life, because I have been a great pretender several times over.

Highly knowlegable? Vastly competent?

I wish... I'm just resourceful, an avid learner, and know where to look. Other than that, I may be good at presenting, and talking about leadership - but this is after years of reading aand teaching about them. I also tend to cross reference ideas. That's me. But being an expert in anything? That can be a stretch... and a misconception that goes around.

A great leader.

Still debatable, far as I'm concerned. Yes, I can lead teams, manage stuff, set goals, and make follow-ups. But I still don't have a track record of having been successful in my own business. This is because I am still at a quandray as to what I can do... what I like to do. I may even lack the initiative to do things I need to do. Procrastinating? That is a big possibility. Something I need to find out why.

To be fair, I am good at certain things too - in other words, I'm not a total loser... I'm resourceful, able to research and learn, communicate and do technology or knowledge transfer... I seem well capable in this. Thus I come across as credible - because I know how to communicate to others. That is my real advantage... and what I need not say is a misconception at all.